K recommends “Chartsengrafs” by Grandaddy
“The Sophtware Slump” by Grandaddy is not only one of my favorite LPs, but one of the best concept albums I’ve encountered. Released in 2000, I was only aware of 2 tracks early on: “The Crystal Lake” and “Hewlett’s Daughter.” Thanks to indie rock radio, these were fun earworms. It wasn’t until a few years later, when I bought the CD, that I discovered these songs had a greater place in the context of themes regarding technology and how we can alternately embrace and feel disquieted by a world so dependent on it. There is also a yearning to return to nature and the basics. This, before smartphones!
I was right there, personally, circa 2003. I was climbing the corporate ladder three rungs at a time, working over-overtime in a highly exhausting IT role that left me feeling like I was missing out on the outside world. Despite leaving my career a few times, I would manage to live and work (albeit poorly) in that world for 12 years. I took a meandering route of decades in order to look back on this and finally feel a sense of relief.
The confusion I experienced while working 60-80 hours a week and live some kind of life beyond the cubicle often triggered undiagnosed mental health issues. The track “Chartsengrafs” definitely rings true for a turning point where I realized I needed to take breaks and not just be a machine that churned out statistics and paperwork. I attended so many meetings during the day that I would take work home, be on call and work weekends. But those attempts to be more social were messy.
I love how this song starts off with how “birds come and then they go.” This was a blink-and-you’ll-miss-it thing when I was busy. I forgot to stop and enjoy things like birdsong. But in a tricky way, there is a bird-tweeting sound peppered into the song… but is it real or manufactured?
For years. I essentially traded my livelihood (“laughs”) for a life of quality assurance and presentations (“chartsengrafs”/”charts and graphs”). This song is sparse in lyrics… but roars with guitar at the idea that a person, who has devoted themselves to their tech job, has no idea what to do with themselves beyond worklife. Once the work is done “your guess is [as] good as mine as to just what kind of trouble I might find tonight… out of my mind.” I wasn’t subtle about breaking free in the evenings and weekends once I tested the waters of putting the piles of work away: staying out/sleeping late, flubbing meetings, napping too long at lunchtime, and ultimately discovering I wasn’t a well person.
I have a whole lot of kinship with this record. But I love how this song chronicles my own (often shaky) attempts at learning to get back to myself. It took time, but I am pleased so much of this is now in the rearview.
K Weber obtained her BA in Creative Writing from Miami University & has 11 self-published, online books of poetry. She writes independently & collaboratively, having created poems from words donated by 300+ people since 2018. Much of K's work (free in PDF & audio) & her publishing credits are on her website: kweberandherwords.com. Find her on Instagram @midwesternskirt!
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